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iQuestions Faculty, Ron Blue 
 
 
Question: 
 
How should we help our grandchildren financially? 
 
Answer: 
 
How should we help our grandchildren? You know, this is a hard one 
for us grandparents, because at this stage of life, we have the financial 
wherewithal that we can help, and we love our grandchildren, and we 
want to have a relationship with them—so it’s easy to do things for 
them and to provide for them that we didn’t even do for our own 
children, because we now have the financial ability to do that. 
 
I just want to reiterate a principle that I’ve used over the years, and 
that is that you never want to get in between the parents and their 
children—or, the parents and your grandchildren. You want to make 
sure that whatever you do fits in within the context of what your 
children and in-laws are trying to do with those children. I never, ever 
want to manipulate my grandchildren’s behavior through finances. I 
always want to, if I’m going to help them, to make it something 
productive in their life. 
 
Now, the reality is that a gift can be productive, because God is a 
gracious God, and when I give a gift, it is in reflection, really, of what 
God does for me also. So, I’m not saying, “Don’t give gifts,” but I’m 
just saying, “Think about the consequences of those gifts on your 
grandchildren.” 
 
I think one of the most beneficial things that Judy and I did with our 
grandchildren was, “What are they going to buy us for Christmas? We 
don’t need anything. We can buy whatever we need.” 
 
 
 
So, what we did for our grandkids is we said, “Here is $100 for each of 
our grandchildren,” and we gave it to them at Thanksgiving. And we 
said, “We want you to give this away before Christmas, and your gift 
to us at Christmastime is to tell us where you gave it.”  
 
I want to tell you something. That is probably the best gift that we 
have ever given our grandchildren. They absolutely loved it. They 
made great decisions on the gift. It had a real impact on them, and 
Judy and I really benefited from that far beyond giving them another 
toy. 
 
We want to use our giving, if you will, our gifts to our grandchildren, to 
reflect God’s grace, to reflect our love for them, but also to reflect 
their responsibility that they have as children—and for sure, we never, 
ever want to do something without asking our children, their parents, 
what would they like. Is this okay with them? Is it in any way 
inhibiting what they would like to do with their children? 
 
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