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iQuestions Faculty, Dr. John Trent 
 
 
Question: 
 
How can I help my child who's struggling to really believe he has a 
special future? 
 
Answer: 
 
It is so challenging for so many kids in the environment that they live 
in. It can be vicious sometimes. It is so challenging for a kid to really 
believe that they’re valuable. 
 
One of the great things we get to do if we’re a parent is to really help 
those kids to know “you can do something special. God can use you in 
the future.” 
 
Let me give you a quick example.  
 
I grew up in a home with a twin brother and an older brother. They 
were both really smart, but my twin brother is brilliant. We’re 
fraternal; I can brag on him.  
 
He graduated summa cum laude in college. I graduated “Lordy-how-
come.” He’s just this brilliant MD/PhD kind of person. 
 
Back in high school, I can remember when we turned in our senior 
term papers. Remember when you were in high school and you did the 
big term paper? Jeff, my twin brother, gets what? He gets an A. That’s 
all he ever got, was A’s.  
 
What did I get? I got a D, as in dog. 
 
 
 
I thought I had done a really good job, I hadn’t started until the night 
before, but I had written it all out, and I had run out of typewriter 
ribbon. (I’m really old. A typewriter, in case you don’t know, is kind of 
like a word processor.) I had run out of typewriter ribbon and so I 
hand-wrote the last few pages. I didn’t do footnotes because I had lost 
the back page that had the footnote part. Obviously, I’m not a real 
detail person.  
 
But I thought I had done a great job. Did you ever see the movie A 
Christmas Story— where the little boy thinks he’s done a great job on a 
paper and everybody carries him around the room?  
 
That’s what I thought. I thought I did great on this. It’s so well-
written. And then I get a D on this. Of course, Jeff’s gotten an A.  
 
I will never forget my mom sitting at that kitchen table and saying 
“Look at me.” So I lifted up my eyes. She knew you need to make 
really good eye-contact when a kid is not feeling good about himself.  
 
She goes, “You didn’t do the footnotes. Why didn’t you wake me up to 
go get typewriter ribbon?” and I kind of dropped my head. But she 
said, “Look at me. You do such a good job of using words, I wouldn’t 
be surprised if you grew up and used words some day to help other 
people.” 
 
What a shock that I’m sitting here, getting to talk to you, and tell you 
about some words that I hope encourages you, and about the way we 
can speak in our kids’ lives and help them realize that they have a 
special future. 
 
The reason I’m able to do it is because I had a mom that saw 
something in me that she was able to say—even though it was a D 
paper and none of my teachers were telling me I had a special future—
but I’m thankful I had a mom that did.  
Trent -2- 
 
 
 
Be that kind of person to others, and to your kids if you have them. 
Help them realize that, whatever God’s put into their life, they can 
have a special future.  
Trent -3- 
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