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iQuestions Expert, Doug Rosenau 
 
 
Question: 
 
Why is 3-dimensional sex (body, soul and spirit) so much more 
exciting and satisfying? 
 
Answer: 
 
I oftentimes get couples who will say—in fact, I wish I had $20, I 
probably could buy a car or something for all the times I’ve heard this 
in sessions over these many years—“I wish my husband could just hug 
me and not grab me.” Or, “I’m in the kitchen doing dinner, and he 
comes and grabs me.” 
 
It reminds me of looking at sex a little bit broader. I may be preaching 
more at the husbands here, but I really think we should view our 
sexuality and our lovemaking three-dimensionally, and our wives 
three-dimensionally: body, soul, and spirit. 
 
There really is a part of it that is body sex, and it’s a lot of fun, and 
Eve is attractive, and we enjoy her.  And more as a male, I sometimes 
sympathize with the wives that this gets old, but at some part, it’s just 
their playfulness, and they are the eternal adolescent. 
 
But I do really preach at the guys, too, and say, “But they need some 
soul sex. They need to really feel emotionally connected to you. They 
need to really feel that you are varied.” Mentality is a part of soul sex. 
You can really enjoy more than the physical touch. Romance is part of 
soul sex. Ask, “How can we create that soul sex?” 
 
And I also think there’s a part of this when I look at it that women, our 
wives, really want to be loved, really want to be attended to. They 
 
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really want to feel included. They really want to become one flesh, to 
really become a partnership. Part of that, to me, is spirit sex, that we 
have this yearning to truly belong, to enjoy, to be with someone, to let 
our spirits commune. 
 
So, guys, careful with the grabbing, OK? Gals, I mean, it’s going to 
happen, please. Give them a break, too. But let’s try to create that 
three-dimensionality, so that we really enjoy the romance, and we 
enjoy our minds and our emotions, and we really have that ability to 
help our partner feel tremendously desired and needed and loved in 
this deep, spiritual, resonating way. 
 
 
 
  
 
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